Up Nort!

 My visit to Oslo seems like ages ago, but it’s only been a month since I visited.  It is amazing what few memories stick in the human brain over a period of 30 days.  I do remember that I practiced Proactive Ignorance while I was in Oslo.  I created this special method of being just for this trip which involved ignoring all concepts of currency and exchange rates (this was not a stretch for me).  Too many friends, guidebooks and blogs had warned me of how expensive Oslo was and I didn’t want it to rain on my Norwegian parade.   

I actually spent most of my time in Oslo walking around in the city, so it wasn’t an expensive trip (Frankly, I don't really know, but that's the beauty of Proactive Ignorance).  Which reminds me - Oslo is a wonderful walking city!  And most people looked like this while they were walking:

I have never seen so many high end strollers, cross country skis, and sleds in my life.  It was astonishing.  But not as astonishing as the naked people.

There were an awful lot of naked statues in Oslo.  When I passed statues of people with clothes on it was startling.  I don't have an issue with the nakedness but I’m confused why this would be featured in such a freaking cold place.   

It struck me immediately how much Oslo reminded me of home (home being Wisconsin).  My forefathers and mothers could not have picked a place more similar to the snowy pine and white birch filled country they came from.  But I will say there were some differences.  Like it was really difficult to find pickled herring and lefse in Oslo (I never did find lefse).  Despite growing up with these Norwegian staples in America, it appeared that the Oslosians had turned away from them.  This was a real bummer and I went on a massive hunt for herring.  I finally found it at a touristy place where I ordered The Norwegian Sampler.

Most of this 3 tiered platter did not make it into my stomach because I thought it was - how should I say? - disgusting.  Somewhere between the herring, reindeer sausage and creamed beets, my mouth refused to open and my hand refused to move.  I sat staring at what probably cost 40 bucks (yay for proactive ignorance!) thinking there is no way in hell that is going in my mouth.  

But I still enjoyed my dining experience because it was silent.  The thing about Norwegians is that they don't talk much, and when they do, it's quiet.  It was so quiet in this particular restaurant that I was afraid to take a bite of flat bread because it was going to be the crunch heard across Oslo.  So I sat and stared at the reindeer sausage and creamed beets instead.

Norwegians aren't only famous for their peculiar food, but also their interesting dress.  And the latest Norwegian fashion craze is the OnePiece.  I haven't exclaimed my undying love for OnePieces enough lately- and so I shall exclaim it now.  I LOVE MY ONE PIECE.  It makes me happy!  And in case you hadn't heard, OnePiece was dreamed up by a couple of young Norwegian geniuses who realized, as they were lying around completely hungover on a Sunday afternoon, that wearing sweat pants was high pressure.  It suggested you should go for a run and the elastic waste put unnecessary pressure across your tummy.  And so they created the OnePiece (WHICH I LOVE...I LOVE IT!) and they have their very own Concept Store on the major shopping street in Oslo.

Me in a OnePiece - They're even more amazing than they look!

Lime green is hot in Oslo too, just slightly different fashion than Ghent.

I'll finish this up with a look at the brave men defending the country of Norway.  If only they thought to wear a OnePiece, they would be far happier.

Notice that it is pretty much empty.  I felt like the only tourist in Oslo.

I think they might have been 16, but black hair got in the way and I couldn't be sure.

The waterfront - it was really cold in Oslo.

And as I was leaving Oslo, I laughed at airport billboard:

What Norwegian in their right mind would choose to fly to NOVA SCOTIA on holiday?  I mean, sure, it might be closer than you think - but so is the Carribean.  Maybe they just like staying Up Nort.  Oof duh!